They went to sleep and I quickly ghetto-rigged my laptop to my t.v. It's actually a quite impressive tangle of cables and for someone that can barely work the GPS in the car I'm pretty damn impressed with myself. I have to admit, watching prelims during prime time is a let-down, I think. I really appreciate Dick Ebersol making the athletes swim their finals at 7 in the morning during the Beijing Olympics. These time zones are going to kill me. In fact, I want FINA to listen up and stop worrying about open water safety (oh wait....nevermind.....) and worry about holding world championships in time zones that work for me. Enough with the middle east and asia, I put my foot down at EST.
Announcers, can we stop calling the women "girls?" I hate to get all bra-burning and Gloria Steinem here but it's straight up condescending. All those women can kick almost all your asses so have some respect. We don't call the men "boys." You gonna call Abby Wambach a "girl?" No, you're not. She'll head-butt you from here to the moon so don't call Vollmer one either.
I'm going to let the experts coffee talk about what happened this morning, especially in the
boys men's 4x100 free relay (Ryan Lochte in the final? Discuss.) Garrett's quote after the race broke my heart. I don't think it was his "fault" and I just want to fly to China and give him a big Jewish Mother hug and a nice loving and rejuvenating bowl of matzah ball soup.
So with a huge amount of hope, excitement and a sprinkling of OCD- tinged obsession fans will stay up late and wake up early for the next week or so. We'll all be completely sleep-deprived, our immune systems will crash and our white blood cell count will shoot through the roof. Maybe we'll all get pneumonia and become better-than-ever versions of ourselves. Now everyone, go take a nap.